We’ve Set the Example, we’ve Care & Fed people, we’ve Set A Vision, now we need to ask ourselves some questions and communicate effectively. Questions Leaders Ask Themselves and Communication follow naturally as we continue on our journey.
Questions help you understand. Questions help you learn. Questions help you communicate. Questions are a form of self-leadership. Wernher von Braun did some very awesome things in his life from the 1930s to the 1970s. Very early on, during World War Two, he helped Germany develop their rocketry program building the V-2 ballistic missile; however, Adolph Hitler turned it into a weapon. (Not so awesome.) When this happened, he surrendered his staff to the United States, and went on to help us develop our rocketry program building the Explorer satellites, the Jupiter, Pershing, Redstone, and Saturn rockets, and Skylab, world’s first space station. People always thought of him as a visionary, even from an early age when he decided his goal in life was to “help turn the wheel of time”. This “visionary” mind was inquisitive enough to wonder if we could go “where no man had gone before” with Apollo 11. His Mother influenced this passion by giving him two priceless gifts. The first was a telescope, which set him on this visionary course, and the second was to ask him, “What questions did you ask in school today?” instead of “What did you learn in school today?” I am not sure when I heard this story, but it has always stayed with me because it gave me a powerful example of the way questions draw out new information, allow us to learn, and in the end, communicate what we have learned. Again, CTIC Eve McAnallen, an expert in speaking languages—French, Russian, Serbo-Croatian—has explained why she thinks this is. She believes that questions bring you to a higher level of conscious reasoning, much like when your mind learns a new language. When you question, you activate your brain to begin to make personal choices in an ordered manner, as when you conceptualize issues, then you can see—envision—new solutions or new information from the questions you ask; you begin to think for yourself. And from my Father, a teacher for 47 years (he says grades 4-17), offers the idea of the Socratic method (an inductive method of teaching vs. the deductive method) of teaching to footnote Chief McAnallen’s thought, “Questioning allows the student the ability to think for themselves, to discover, to make a connection, to search for the relative truth from the specific to the general; to become an autonomous—think by themselves—thinker. And I’ll offer some thoughts by Anthony Robbins, from Awaken The Giant Within, “The questions you will ask will determine where you focus, how you think, how you feel, and what you do.” (p. 183), and “…thinking itself is nothing but the process of asking and answering questions”. (p. 179)
Thinking comes after questions. This follows naturally and some might say, “… goes without saying”. The reason I mention it here is that in “thinking about things”, leaders, and followers ask themselves questions to learn new things, to help frame their thinking. And in the application of “thinking about things”, Max DePree has a wonderful way of framing leadership ideas: he makes lists of questions. He believes that a question brings a discipline to thinking much as a musical score does for one who plays music, “…before it really comes to life, it must be interpreted and performed.“ (Max DePree, Leadership Jazz, p. 220) The list then frames, or orders the thoughts, “a list may help coalesce your thinking”. How this is accomplished will depend on your style. From Leadership Without Power Max DePree says, “Questions often make us uncomfortable, especially good questions, but they can be the source of insight and the beginning of progress.” (p. 53) Here is a list of questions to ponder. Some are Max’s, and some are mine, thought provoking nonetheless.
What do we, as leaders owe? Who do we answer to? Do we know what is expected? Are we as leaders “owned” by our followers—do we serve them? Do those we lead know the mission? Do we? Do those we lead know what their role is? Do we? What can we learn by walking in the shoes of those we serve, and what can we expect of those who follow? Where do we stand in time of trouble? How do we see ourselves as leaders; how well do we know ourselves? How do we see those who follow; how well do we know them? Do we see success or look for failure in those we serve? How do we communicate with our followers, and our leaders? Do we? How do we comprehend the language of leaders? Do we? Do we forgive? Do we celebrate success? How do we measure success? How can we “carve out” room for people to pursue their potential? Do we give the gift of freedom; do the people we lead have the tools, training, time, permission and space to succeed? Do we develop those who would replace us or do we consider ourselves indispensable? Do I add value by what I do? And, of course, some Care & Feeding questions: How are you; how are you doing today? Is there anything else I can help you with? And finally, the classic “Lessons Learned” questions prefaced by, what can I learn: what just happened here; why did this happen; who was involved; when did this happen; how did it happen; what was the extent? And I am sure you can think of many more questions. These questions require the “thinking to come first”, they “list” our thoughts, allow us frame our issues, to draw out new information, and think for ourselves. “Always the beautiful answer who asks a more beautiful question”—E. E. Cummings.
Communication, I can’t say enough about this. All leaders realize there is some component of communication associated with their roles. Letting those who follow know the vision, the mission, doing course corrections, rewarding, getting a feel for how things are going, displaying attitude, delegation, rewarding, training, etc. We have different ways to do it too: telephone, E-mail, fax, written form (this newsletter), verbal, non-verbal, body language, emotion (“Unspoken words”, my Father says.), intuition, “accessibility”, even, if you will, “unconscious” and “unintentional” communication—communication that “just is”, and finally, behavior. There is a tie-in for Questions Leaders Ask Themselves and Communication. Let me explain. When you question, when you make lists of questions, when you discover, you begin to strip down ideas and thoughts into their basic elements. The connection to communication is that questioning allows us to think—day dreaming, fantasy, problem solving, reasoning, and free association. This thinking then is transformed into symbols we can change or manipulate, such as with a language where the symbols and sounds are collected into meaningful units and manipulated. Children, when very little, perceive their first thoughts on communication through colors. This introspective questioning allows us to get at the roots of our thinking, the symbols and sounds of our language—the color—to get at our core thoughts, to get at our core beliefs, which ultimately affect who we are: our behavior. Questioning makes a connection between words—language—and behavior. How we choose to act on these thoughts—our presence—says the rest.
As mentioned above, there are many forms of communication. If we as leaders and followers aren’t “sick and tired of it” as Max DePree says, then maybe we aren’t doing a good enough job. Our “voice”, as leaders and followers very much depends on how we communicate. “Our voices, our words, are essential but in vain without action.” (Leadership Jazz, p. 129) If we can get at the heart of a language of communication through questioning, if we can better understand how to communicate, then we can begin make a connection between our words and our behaviors. And as we all know, our behaviors are observed in the daily interaction with those around us. And our behaviors form the basis of trust, of Setting the Vision, of Care & Feeding, of Questioning; the Essential Elements of leadership. One of the forms of communication is through e-mail. We use a lot of in the Reserves. Two practical ideas seem to help in dealing with it. The first is to use the “24-48 Rule”. I adopted this a while back and the idea is that if the e-mail you receive, or are about to send, emotes quite a bit of emotion in you, then wait 24 hours. If your emotion is high after this initial period, then wait 24 more. If you still feel strongly, then re-phrase, and send. The idea is to never send the e-mail to begin with so that the emotions don’t “force” your communication. The second practical idea for e-mail—and I heard this on Public Radio—is to “tag” each Subject line with acronyms associated with “actions”. For example, “NR” could mean “No Response Needed”, or “IAR” could mean, “Immediate Action Required”, and then “911” could mean, “Emergency Action Required!” You get the idea. The best advice I’ve heard on e-mail comes from CDR Overman, our Skipper, “Just pick up the phone and call”. Another practical idea for communication is to role-play. I have used it at times to help me “practice” being a leader, or follower. The idea is to “act” the part of the leader, or follower by talking with someone as if you are in the moment for whatever action you may take. This idea works especially well when you role-play with one or more people because the words, actions, and even body language can be heard and observed and become very powerful insight of what a leader may encounter. Effective listening is a form of communication; it’s an “active behavior”. In his book The Truth About Managing People, Stephen Robbins offers that active listening requires us to “get inside the speaker’s head so that you can understand the communication from his or her point of view”. He says we need “to take responsibility for completeness”. How? Making eye contact; nodding our heads in recognition; facial expressions; avoid distracting actions or gestures; asking questions to clarify points and ensure understanding; paraphrasing to restate in our own words what we believe the speaker has said; letting the speaker complete the thought; avoid interruptions and “saying too much”; and finally, by transitioning smoothly between the roles of speaker and listener, and back to speaker. (pp. 106-108)
Framing and The Language of Potential are powerful companions is the use of communication. I realize these a two separate ideas; however, I believe they compliment each other in the way that allows leaders use of communication to influence those around them. Framing is illustrated by Martin Luther King Jr.’s speech, “I Have a Dream!” Think of it, he “framed” his words so that others could see things the way he saw them; he saw, in his mind’s eye, a place where there was no racial prejudice! He believed it, and he influenced many, including me, what leadership is all about. So “framing” is essentially getting people to see things the way you see them, or as a photographer sees them through the lens of a camera. Steve Robbins explains it like this, “Framing is a way to use language to manage meaning.” (p. 82) Here’s how he does it: five language forms (again, the tie-in to language) of metaphors, jargon, contrast, spin and stories. Well, we all know which one I like the best: stories! He says stories frame issues with examples that are “larger than metaphors or jargon”, but I would add that stories are a way to “connect” with people—see Care & Feeding—in a common way. Jargon, well, we all know that the Navy has “jargon” to relate to people “in the know”, e.g. port, starboard, Quarterdeck, fore and aft. Metaphors, he says, “help us understand one thing in terms of another”, e.g. when referring to a car that performs well, “that engine purrs like a kitten”. Contrast he says is a technique that “illuminates a subject in terms of its opposite”, e.g. the Coast Guard may say, “We are NOT the Navy!” And finally spin, where you “cast your subject in a positive or negative light”, which has merits when emphasizing strengths or weaknesses.
The Language of Potential is an idea that comes from Max DePree in Leading Without Power (pp. 69-85) and perfect in this discussion of questions, language, and communication. Now, I am all for “leading without power”, since this is his idea again about Servant Leadership. The merit of The Language of Potential is derived in the way we see ourselves as leaders, and followers. He says, “The first step in learning any language, including the language of potential, is to understand, who I am, where I belong, what part I play in this family, church, hospital, or community.” Here are a few of his words in this “language”, and some of them, you may recognize from previous articles: Vision; Thanks; Love; Truth; Forgiveness; Please; Service; Hope and Restoration. These words, he believes—this language—should demonstrate “virtues of civility and restraint and respect for others”. His reason is that he believes our behavior, in the highest form of expression, has long-term consequences in our communications. Toward that end, and I believe this is the critical point in his idea, and directly in line with anything to do with leadership, is that we as leaders are in the business of “moving groups of people…in the direction of maturity as a community”. Think of Admiral Master’s role as a leader. He has a BIG job of moving all of us as we transform into a “new world”; he HAS to shift us into a new paradigm just as fast as he can. And for this, he HAS to use The Language of Potential. “That’s when people have the chance to reach their potential”. (p. 76) To underscore this point, I would offer that all communication we use should be centered on The Language of Potential. Why? Simply put, as mentioned above in Questions, to continually “communicate” the value of people in an everyday, routine, or automatic manner. People are the reason we all are leaders; we need to make it our business to speak to them as if they were gold and see them as always being successful.
Questions and communication, both are intertwined in ways we can comprehend, and ways we don’t. Through questions we figure out who we are as leaders, what we owe, whom we serve, we discover new information, and how to think for ourselves. Through our voice and presence as leaders, we move groups of people. And through moving people we mature as a community and we reach our potential. What questions did you ask today?
